Hello Mamser!

Upon entry to any "serviced" establishment in Kuwait, I am greeted by no less than 2, but no greater than 5 Fillipino employees chiding in chorus, "Hello Mamser!" or "Good evening Mamser!" or any of the other common salutations followed by Mamser (pronounced like mom-sir or on a rare occasion, mom-sher). Apparently, there has been an addition to the English language. Mamser, the bastardized interbreeding of the titles Ma'am and Sir has been shortened into one world for the sake of ESL convenience.

Any group of all male patrons will be referred to with "Good evening Ser" (singular) with a focus on the "rrrr." Add one female and the entire group becomes Mamser. For instance if I am in the back of the group and we walk into a restaurant, I will hear the round of "Hello Serrrr" and then, when they see me, "Oh! Hello Mamser! I'm sorry Mamser!" As if a smart slap across the face is in order for any service person who forgets my Mamser.

What's most incredible is that the tone and pronunciation is exactly the same across the city. No matter where you go, all restaurants that expect to serve Westerners employ Fillipino workers and everyone you meet knows the Mamser.

I've heard theories of gene migration; when after a great enough number of a particular species learns a new trait the entire species group then knows the trait without having to learn it. Like the little monkey who lived on an island and learned to wash his yams in the sea before eating them. He taught the other monkeys on his island to do the same and when 100 monkeys all knew to wash their yams in the sea, the monkeys on another island who had never witnessed yam washing started the practice as well. I'm not comparing Filipinos to monkeys; that would be racist. I'm just saying, gene migration man; it's the only possible explanation for the recurrence of Mamser.