Oh Hold Me Back: Your Ear is Blinking

This is dedicated to all of you cyborg Bluetooth ear piece wearing mega-men. If only women were moths...

I couldn't help myself. I saw a tiny blink of blue from across the room, like a lighthouse beacon calling in this thirsty ship. The paradox of the sea: in the midst of all that water, dehydration is your bedside nemesis. Like a weary captain, I navigate through bar scene of familiar waters: the old guy with his Asian girlfriend, the group of Arab dudes more interested in each others hair than the few big-eyed girls looking like yesterday's news, the sex tourists and ATM bait. Scanning the bar reveals a horizon silhouetted with old, familiar foes.

>Blink<

Hold on... The tide has shifted. There. It was there.

>Blink<

Oh my god.
I think my London Bridges wanna go down... Wait, what did I say? No that's just the crappy song they're playing in this crappy dive. How did I get on the ship-at-sea tangent anyway? To the drinks! Social anesthesia is required.

>Blink<

Pretty. Oh my god. There's a pretty blue fairy in here? How do they survive in the desert? I always thought of them as adorable woodland critters that make champagne from dew drops and Persian rugs from mossy logs. Little fairy, come here, little fairy, I'll help you back Neverland. Dammit! You dirty lost boys... stop humping my leg. This is a dance floor not the freakin' tree fort. No, I don't want to hold your marbles. Why did I walk out on the dance floor anyway? To the bar!

>Blink<

Ooooooooh. Blue light of destiny so magical. Your beam has me like an alien night light glowing through the darkness, scaring away closet monsters and hallway noises, letting me know where the wall is. I have been known to walk into a wall before. But not tonight... no way. I have you, Alien Nightlight, to guide me. Where did you go...
>Blink<
Oh yesss! I clap my hands and peddle my feet like the fluttering of retarded moth wings. Who needs 4th of July when I have you Blinky Blue Alien Nightlight. Beam me again.
>Blink< Yesss! (More fluttering moth wings) Oh hold me back....

Does that thing have vibrate mode?